We can thank Canada for a lot of things—poutine, All Dressed chips, Dieu du Ciel!, and Rush, to name a few—but I don’t know if a variety of whiskey stones will be added to that list anytime soon. However, Morgan Street Company out of Ontario is giving it a shot, opening their store with a variety of stones to help moderately cool your drink. Although if you like your whiskey on the colder side, a more effective means of cooling it would be to throw the stones out into the snow in Canada and then carry your drink out to retrieve them.
Needless to say, if you’re a fan of having your drink on the cooler side, or enjoy the transition it makes when the ice melts a bit and dilutes your whiskey slightly, stones are not for you. If, however, you want your drink slightly below room temperature and want a hassle in stone-cleaning form, by all means give these things a shot. Their Kickstarter is open and aiming for $20,000 Canadian, which is only like $37 in the US I think.
The stones are made from soapstone and come in a variety of shapes and sizes, including a skull (sick, brah!) and a 14-sided tetradecahedron for whoever would be a fan of that kind of thing. There’s also a large, flat disc you can put in your drink that weighs a whopping three ounces (the same weight as the skull)—a great way to chip one or all of your teeth when you tip your glass up for that last bit of whiskey and get a huge rock falling into your face. Something you don’t have to worry about with melting ice.
Surely the company means well, but with whiskey stones—which seem to get a solid “meh” from most whiskey drinkers—they may have started on a slower foot. And if you’re going to order something from Canada to go with your booze, make it a bag of Intense Pickle Doritos. Trust me, they’ll have much more of a positive impact on your taste buds than whiskey stones.
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